All I Want

      


 'All I ask, all I seek is You, is You. All I want, all I need is You....'

     What would it be like to really live as if you undoubtedly believed that ALL you needed was God? What if you let yourself be stripped down to your very core; soul, spirit, and heart exposed. Would you stand there proudly ready for Him to see it all? I know I wouldn't. I would most likely be embarrassed and a little ashamed. For me though, the awe inspiring thing is this; God already knows everything we would so quickly want to hide. The little nuances that make us who we are, those mistakes that have taught us strengthening lessons, and the less than perfect pathways we have chosen to follow. God already sees them all and He still calls me His child. He still wants to help me sing my song. He still sees us as beautiful, silly mistakes and all. I don't know about you but that fills my spirit, soul and even my burdened, heavy heart with immeasurable, tear jerking joy.

Learning to Sew

    In my bedroom hangs a quote I chose for my calligraphy college class.  The quote reads, "Some people weave burlap into the fabric of our lives and some weave gold thread.  Both contribute to make the picture beautiful and unique."  The author is anonymous but, whoever it was that decided to pen down those words was very wise.
    Today, as I go about my Saturday chores, I am contemplating the burlaps and the gold threads that pass through my life.  I realize the gold threads have not always been the best people.  They have at times been the hardest lessons learned, the broken hearts, and the struggles I have had the privilege to endure.  The burlaps on the other hand have become my very best friends and strongest support groups.  Burlap is long lasting and durable, even though at first touch it may be rough and coarse.  Gold thread is pretty to look at and gives the fabric some shimmer.  However, over time it will fade, become threadbare, and break.

    Another thought that came to mind while pondering the above quote was this, what would my life's fabric look like had I let it go and allowed God to simply sew?  But, really all this time He has been teaching me how to use each tidbit of string, scrap of burlap, and spool of gold thread.  With His skillful hand He has guided my tiny ones, showing me where to put the thread, where to add the burlap.  Some years down the road He and I will be sitting back admiring our tapestry and we will both smile.

Writings of the heart

   While cleaning out my closet in an effort to slim down on the useless items collecting dust, I came across two poems I have written.  And I thought I would share them here.  I enjoy writing, and poetry has become a way that I can let go some off my day to day stresses and anxieties.  God has given me the gift of words, so I have been told.  I simply write what is on my heart.  Sometimes it has to do with what I am going through, most times it has to do with people I care about.  My first poem was written when I was 14 and I have been writing ever since. I hope you enjoy and maybe they will speak to you. God's blessings on you today and during the week ahead.

Psalms 63:7*
Eryn Edlund

She kneels down
praises for her Lord
pouring from her
broken blind sighted heart

She sits quietly
prayerful thanksgiving
rising from her
torn, sorrowful soul

Though her face
is streaked with tears
she cries out glory
to her heavenly Father

She still has days
full of saddened memories
yet she takes time
to worship her Jesus

She sings her
little love song
as sobs continue to
choke out every other word

Safe in His embrace
her vulnerable spirit
hears Him whisper,
"This is my favorite song."

September 12,2011
* Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of Your wings.
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My Happiness Project
Eryn Edlund

Search for your joy
not how or if you will fit in
what, when everyone else is gone
puts that twinkle in your eye

hold tightly, focus on
the simplicity
you know lies within somewhere
hidden from view for a time

encase yourself in discovering
the depth of that joy
each beautiful aspect
every piece of it

Let the joy tear away
the ugly, the terrible
let it melt away
the insecurities and strongholds

move through the process
allow the joy to be overwhelming
permit this new idea
to permeate you entirely

do not shy away
breath in its very essence
let yourself become
and someday when you are truly ready

let another learn to love your joy

January 19,2013

Puddle Jumping

     Well since it’s been over a year since my last post.  I have decided to start blogging again.  Today has been a learning day, learning to dance in the rain and jump feet first into the puddles.  Life is hard and sometimes just knowing that fact is frustrating.  But then I stop and think if life were simple we would get bored too easily. Today I had a lesson in trusting God to watch over a couple things in my life that may have seemed insignificant to an onlooker.  But for me they were heart wrenching, there was nothing else I could do but simply place the items in His sovereign hands and let go.  I did shed tears as I let go but that in and of itself was a small victory.  I struggle with letting go and letting God.  Today I did just that and through that small act I learned how to dance once again in the rain.  Splish splashed right through that puddle, head held high, smile on my face.  Sometimes it’s the small victories that bring us the most joy.  So here’s to puddle jumping and dancing in the rain.